Thursday, November 29, 2012

le 15 novembre (teacher talk)

le 15 novembre:

- In general, I had a really great day today.  In the middle of my 12eme SS math class, it all of a sudden struck me, I'm a teacher. I'm an educator.  Je suis un enseignant.  J'enseigne en francais.  Wow! I've got a rapport with my students and they're learning.
Life is good.

- I have a constant internal struggle between my pedagogic ideals and values.  I have a very liberal/ laissez-faire approach to teaching.  Ideally, I would create an atmosphere in which all my students would want to be there, learn, create, and explore.  Motivation and drive would come from them and I would simply navigate.  But that's an ideal and can at times not be the reality of the matter.  But I still have a responsibility to these kids, even if they don't want to learn.
Sticking point one/Tough question #1:
If a student doesn't want to learn or doesn't want to try, should I make them?  It's his or her own life and it's his or her own choice, n'est-ce pas?  But if he or she doesn't have the foresight to realize that it's in his or her best interest to learn and succeed, does it then become my responsibility to make him or her learn?  My goal is to impact people's lives for the better (against their will or not?) and that is the job.
Sticking point two:
I don't like negative incentivising, but if a student doesn't have the drive to be the best or at least be competitive, but instead, simply just get by, then positive incentivising doesn't work too well.  de plus, penalizing is the norm here.  If I don't penalize students, there will be those who won't have respect in the classroom (as I'm starting to see).
Tough question #2:
How do you penalize someone while still giving them the greatest access to success? Kicking a student out is a hindrance to learning - but if the student is hindering the learning of others is it justified - (yes, but make up that time with the student later?).

- I constantly wonder what I must do to have the biggest impact and in what domain - where is the biggest need or what's the most important issue.  I'm currently leaning towards education and that that is the most important aspect of life as well as the best route to effect other domains.  If I settle on education the question becomes, how can I have the biggest impact or how can I impact the most people within the realm of education? Qu'est-ce qu'il faut faire?

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

le 13 novembre (la pluie)

le 13 novembre:

- There's nothing quite like hearing the power and might of the inevitable rain as it crashes down on the mountain and the valley bellow, and watching its approach in anticipation jusqu'a l'instant qu'il est partout et il tappe dur!

le 2 novembre (a good day of repose)

le 2 novembre:

- Last night I dreamt that I lived/ worked in a construction compound, and upon waking up (within the dream) I started singing "It's been a hard day's night, and I've been workin' like a dog" and repeating just that line over and over.  This then turned into a big musical number, with all the hundred or so other compound-mates joining in.  And because of its ridged construction compound nature it was a very rough and tough dance, but including pirouettes.  So good! Also the notables in the dream include the following: Dan Mark, Aly Ahrens, and Michael Jeffrey.  Odd assortment, but still awesome!

- Went for a walk last night, a night-walk, which was awesome!  Not being able to see the ground makes even walking an adventure!  Then I came back and watched the lightning on the mountain for half an hour to an hour.  Slow paced living.

- After this, being a monk wouldn't bee too hard.  Not a lot to change...

- A great day of "repos" lifts the spirits!  Woke up after an entertaining dream (see above) while sleeping until 6h10 (!), didn't have class to prepare for, but since I have the keys to the school I still had to go in.  After opening up the school - doors, windows, and all - I spent class in the teachers' office doing work - which was nice and calm and a good place to work away from the house (finally).  I also had the opportunity to talk with some of my students to get to know them a little bit more.  I asked them such things as: what they would like to do after school, what they believed was the value of school, why they were there, who they were there for, and about their families.  They really said some amazing things.  They of course said they were there for themselves, but they also said that the importance of going to school included helping those who don't go to school and to help the future of their country and its people. They want to be doctors and mathematicians or even president! how awesome!  However it did surprise me how long it took them to think of what it was that they wanted to be.  then because the Proviseur had to leave early, he gave me more keys - the keys to "la direction" - his office.  So I closed up all the school including lowering the flag, closing all the classrooms and windows and the teachers' office - tout et tout!  Then did some peaceful reading, then ran about four miles.  Upon return, I used my bench and some cinder blocks from around my house to lift weights! Exhausting but awesome!  To feel like I have - or could have again- muscles, yes, feels good.  I then ran another 2km into town to meet up with another teacher, for who knows what, but he decided he was too busy with other things, so sent me to buy myself some bread, and I returned home.  I enjoyed a delicious Fanta impersonator, Fifa, that my host mom gave me!!  Aw, so sweet - her and the drink.  During that time of relaxing, my bud Abdoulaye came over for French lesson #2.  He unfortunately doesn't go to school but he really does want to learn French.  So we studied for about an hour- he's already picking up about 45 words! I'm very proud of him! :) ensuit, I finally took a shower - so refreshing! No matter how hot it is, that first gobelet of water is always cold! As soon as I stepped out of the shower I was greeted by an absolutely gorgeous sunset!  - then a bunch of petits.  Refreshed and feeling better prepared for the next two years!

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

le 28 octobre

le 28 octobre:

- I just framed my service in a really self deprecating way;  I was thinking about how people thank me for what I'm doing and say that it's so great or it's so nice, but then I thought, people should be just as respectful and thankful to the teachers here.  They're the real heroes.  They're here every day, every year.  I'm selfish.  I'm going to leave in two years.  For what? - to further my own agenda.  I'm here to serve a need and in two years I'm just going to up and leave.  Two years is the end date, not when the need is met... That's kind of messed up.  I kind of feel like a terrible person.

Monday, November 26, 2012

le 27 octobre (school notes and memories)

le 27 octobre:

- Going back through one of my old notebooks (notes from Real Analysis II) wow that class was hard.  I'm overwhelmed just flipping through the notes! (Shout out to Laura Smith and Johnny Graves!)  Then to Algebraic Geometry!! So lost. (Wasif!)  After a couple pages of that it goes to "Complex Analysis: I escaped!"  SOOO much easier!!! 
Wow. My last year at Olaf was actually pretty cool! So many great people, so many great ideas, so many great memories! Merci beaucoup a tous!
Some great quotes from Complex Analysis:
"Here's a bold claim, 7." - Zorn
"by hook or by crook" - Zorn
"Get your head outa your ass.  We're doin' Math!!"

- Reading the World Resources 2005 Report The Wealth of the Poor: Managing Ecosystems to Fight Poverty, and then seeing poverty first hand in a rural village in a developing nation, I wan to alleviate the plague of poverty which affects some 3 billion people!  The report talks about the ecosystems that the poor rely on and the governance necessary for their development, but then also about tapping markets, technological advances, and globalization.  But it's hard to fathom that living in a tiny village that has no electricity no legitimate roads, the nearest big city is 130km away but it takes 5 hours to get there, and very few people seem to even know where the country is located on a map. 
As I said the other day, my family apologized because they had no food.  Similarly, when I asked another volunteer friend how her fete de Tabaski was she said, "okay." - Celebrating a Muslim holiday here in Guinea means putting on nice clothes, praying, and eating a lot of food.  When I asked her why her fete was just "okay," she said it was because her family didn't have any food, not even rice!  This country has great land and plentiful rain; to not have any food is a travesty.  I really want to help, but it's an overwhelming problem.  For the moment, je doit prendre courage (I must take courage) and believe that I'm making a difference here and somehow it will also tie back to poverty reduction and food security...

- A guy came over today playing some American rap music on his phone and he asked me if I knew that language... of course, but I really wish I didn't.  Not that I wish I didn't know English, but that I couldn't understand what the rapper was saying.  Maybe I was desensitized to those kinds of lyrics when I was in the US and now being here, not surrounded by music, I've become resensitized, but it was just awful!  Then he showed me videos of what I was thankful to have avoided yesterday - the slaughter of goats... It was an unfortunate visit.  

le 26 octobre (the goats)

le 26 octobre:

- One month of service and the fete des moutons.  Successfully avoided seeing or having any of them being killed!  Hurray.  Unfortunately I was still served a meat sauce... Since I was eating by myself I avoided the meat and threw it out my window... I felt really bad about this.

- In a new place it's easy to be occupied with all the bumps, twists and turns in the path but once you know them, you can start to look up and realize the immense beauty around you.

- Tabaski brought in a lot of people from out of town who then accused me of being a stranger.  Yes, but the dark dark blue pot is calling the kettle black, my friend.  Frustrating.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

le 24 octobre (It rains down in Africa! My friend Pitter-Pat)

le 24 octobre:

Pitter-Pat
- Ah that distinct pitter-patter, I know it well.  It's that sound that you think, you hope, could be something else, but you know it's not.  It's the sound of the inevitable - you knew it was coming before you even left.  It makes itself known before it even arrives "chez toi," that's the pitter-patter part.  It's the roar that comes next.  But couldn't it just wait.? - you've almost made it back, back to the safety of your hut or house.  It was only past the gate, up the hill, through the bush, an extended salutation to a neighbor here and a handshake there, around a corner, and you'd be home.  But alas, welcome to the rainy season, where the greeter's the Pitter-Pat. 

A sad reality:
- My host family gave me a bean sandwich today instead of the usual rice and sauce, and then said in broken French, "Sorry, we don't have any money today. I'm going to go work in the field and we'll buy rice tomorrow." Wow.

Students...
- Kids, they selectively choose to adhere to "l'heure." 
"Oh class starts at 8h00, I can arrive at 8h15, 8h20, 8h30, right?"
"But Monsieur, it's 10h00. C'est l'heure!"
"Oh recreation is 15 minutes long and class starts again at 10h15, it's not a problem if I just stand outside until 10h30, 10h40, 10h45."
"Oh Monsieur, c'est 12h00! Il est l'heure!" - That's not even l'heure!  If each class is 2 hrs long, the first class starts at 8h00 and goes until 10h00, then 15 min of recreation, then the second class starts at 10h15 (theoretically) and now you want to say class is over at 12h00! Eh Allah!

Teacher Talk:
-Got to talk school and development with a couple of teachers today, which was awesome!  Unfortunately, it was while we were waiting to pay our condolences to a student who had lost her father.  Mais ca c'est la vie.  It's got its highs and lows all wrapped up in a bow...

Students (2)...
- There are some students that are just awesome; they care, they're smart, they listen, they try, but then there are the rest.  I say something like, "try this problem on your own" or "what would the answer to this be?"  Heads don't go down into the notebooks to start trying the problem, nor do they even turn to the board where I've written the problem, they just stare straight at me with the blankest faces I've ever seen.  this leads me to rambling - "you are intelligent! TRY! THINK! I'll be happy with anything you say... Have respect for yourselves.  Work for your proper success.  I won't be here forever to help you, you have to be able to think for yourself.  Problem solving is a skill you need to have no matter what you do in life!"  ...more blank stares...

The earth is ALIVE:
- Just staring at a small area of the ground hundreds of ants working together, forging their way into the grass as a unit.  A grand society of thousands of termites each one pulling its own weight for the progression of the community.  Then even smaller all around this are even smaller ants going about the daily grind, grasses, flies, and other plants and insects all in less than 1/10th m^2.  Incroyable!

Saturday, November 24, 2012

le 23 octobre (des commentaires)

le 23 octobre:

- The hardest part? Being without friends and for two years.  It's not that I don't have friends here, but at least for the moment we don't hang out or spend time together outside of school and random passings. I'm either "trop" extroverted or not extroverted enough.  I have a need to be around people but I haven't (yet) thrown myself at people.  I want to go for a walk in this beautiful place with someone or just sit around and talk about "n'import quoi." ("whatever")
But all this would be more managable if I weren't to keep thinking, "and this is for two years!?"  Two years without getting to see my friends!? Ah bon?! C'est impossible! Et puis meme quand je retournerai, ou se trouvera mes amis? Ce n'est plus facile.  ("Oh really!? It's impossible! And then even when I come back, where will all my friends be? It's not easy anymore.") But I would never quit (the Peace Corps), soo... Ca va aller. Ca doit aller!  (It'll come along, it's got to!) This is one of the reasons the first three months are the hardest, but the resolution to this problem is what makes leaving the hardest part. 

- Today even more than yesterday I was told that they (the people in my village) are going to find me a beautiful wife here and that I'm going to bring her back to the US with me. On va voir (we'll see.)

- As homework today I gave my 11eme SE/SM physics class:
1) Trouver une exemple d'une translation rectiligne ou curviligne. Find an example of rectilinear or curvilinear motion.
2) Dans au moins 2 phrases decrire ce que le respect veut dire selon vous. In at least 2 sentences, describe what respect means to you.

Ils vont apprendre plus que la physique et les mathematique seules. They're going to learn more than just physics and math.


Des commentaires post election

I'm proud of my country. 

I will admit, those aren't words that would have always expressed my opinion about my country, but one has to remember that my generation has grown up where a majority of our lives have been while our country has been at war - and not even a war against a people or a person but an idea, and unlike people ideas aren't conscious and thus can't retreat or give up.  All that is to say, I haven't always been proud of my country's international presence.  However, in the wake of Obama's re-election, in light light of my experiences here in Guinea and serving in the Peace Corps in general, and upon reflection of Obama's first electoral victory, I can say with conviction, I am proud of my country.
I'm proud to serve my country by serving another country.  And I'm proud of my country to understand that wisdom. 
Not being able go five steps outside my house without hearing someone - a Guinean, obviously - saying "OBAMA!" or seeing a shirt that says "Obama girl" or an umbrella that has Obama's name written on it or a flashlight with Obama's face or "Obama lube" - car grease, or my friend Yacine (the philosophy teacher at my school, a Guinean) reciting word for word various speeches of Obama, really makes me realize that I am a citizen of a special country.  The people here love the United States, but their adoration of Obama indicates something more.  People don't admire us because we have a powerful army or the biggest weapons, nor because we're one of the wealthiest nations, nor because we have some of the best schools, instead they admire our ideals.  They admire our democracy - that when Obama won against McCain in 2008, McCain was the first to congratulate Obama, likewise this year in 2012 Romney again congratulated Obama on his victory.  People - myself included - admire what Obama represents: a United States of America, where the American Dream is a reality, where an underlying humanity unites us in spite of differences in race or creed. 
In 2008, Obama represented Change - in fact he was the beacon of hope that we, as a people national and global, had for change.  Change - progress to a more united country and a world that's healthier, safer, and more equitable.  This time in 2012 Obama's re-election shows that we're still hungry for that change, but that we realize it doesn't come over night, nor over 1461 nights, but that doesn't diminish our hope for change.  We believe it can come, and if it can come, with our will and our action, it will come.

Friday, November 23, 2012

le 22 octobre (thoughts on culture and language)

le 22 octobre:

- Went for a walk. It was awesome! This place is SO beautiful and so tranquil.  I was really close to being completely lost and possibly far from any road, or the only road I knew led home anyway, as night was quickly approaching.  But heuresement (fortunately) my sense of direction and adventure/curiosity/determination got me back taking paths I had never seen before! Score!

- It's amazing how culture changes language, that is to say, communication, conversation, and interactions - but that's culture isn't it... The thought that brought this to mind was a comparison of casual conversation.  Often in the US (in English), we start conversations with questions such as:
"how's it going?"; "how are you?"; "how was your day?"
The essential translation exist in French and even in Pular and Susu:
"Ca va?"; "Comment allez-vous?"; "Comment s'est passe la nuit?"; "Avez-vous bien dormi?" et tous ca.  Ou en Pular:
"Tana aala ton?"; "On belike e jam?"; "On nallen e jam?"; "Golle nden no e jam?"; "Bhyngure nden no e jam?"; Ou en Susu:
"Tana mu xi?"; "Xeri xi?"; "Tana mu fenen?"; "Tana mu na?"
But for each expression there's a set response with the tiniest of windows for variation.  It's always, "things are great" loosely translated from literally, "there is no evil" or "peace only."  The wiggle is getting to say, "seedha" or "un peu" in response to "no marsude?" and "ca va?" respectively in Pular and French.  And in passing that's the case for English in the US too, but they are also the gateway questions to talking about things that happened that day or in the recent past.  Here in Guinea, they ask so many questions (how's it going, the family, the work, the night, the sleep, the wife, the kids, etc.) but never is there an insightful response.  Rather for conversation as I've gleaned so far, they tell anecdotal stories from their lives, or movies they've seen...
Maybe it's just me clinging to my culture, but when I ask, "how are you doing?" I really want to know how you're doing.  ( I'm also excited to discover more about the culture and conversation here; I realize "au debut" I have a very superficial understanding of the subject, but I'll learn more "petit-a-petit."

Thursday, November 22, 2012

le 21 octobre (des commentaires)

le 21 octobre:

- There are a bunch of vultures having a party on my neighbor's roof, and it's tin of course so it's making quite the raucous.

- This morning I had a giant bowl of buille, which is both awesome and dangerous.  Dangerous soley due to my commitment to the clean plate (or bowl in this case) club.  So full.